I generally choose not to talk about things that are controversial or that may cause arguments; but sometimes you have to step out of your comfort zone, you know? So, here we are then, stepping into the ‘uncomfortable’.
As a child I was raised as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses, branching from Christianity; so having the general beliefs in God and Jesus but along with the bigger differences including the date of Jesus’s birth and how he died. Along with the more commonly known aspects like not celebrating birthdays and pagan holidays, not associating themselves with “the world” and the most controversial of all; the refusal of blood transfusions.
From as young as I can possibly remember until the age of 16; this was my life. I lived and breathed this lifestyle. I didn’t know any different. Attending meetings, going out knocking on doors (to the annoyance of everyone I’m sure) and living wholesomely. It was tough; being the subject of ridicule on many occasions due to the belief I had, not being able to enjoy what it’s like being a kid like all the others, but having such restrictions. But it was a life I lived, mainly due to the fact that I was scared to step outside of it.
But came the age of 15 and I began to see the holes in the bible stories, the lies behind the truths, the questions which were answered solely on faith alone and no evidential proof, and the two faced acts belonging to the people we are suppose to rely on like the Elders. So after months of internal struggles I made the choice to leave.
This was horrendous because of a couple of reasons. One being because it was tough seeing how my family had to treat me because this happened. And I know that they only acted the way the only knew how, but I still have some pretty hectic flashbacks of the painful moments and heartbreaking words that were said to me. And the other reason, because it was a life I only knew, it was like I was reborn but into a world that I had no idea about. I was living in a world that made no sense to me because I was living in a guarded world. And then the stresses of “is the world going to end, have I made the wrong decision”. It’s been 7 years since I left and I still have these tormenting thoughts.
Anyway, that is my background when it comes to religion. I have a pretty good idea of it, and The first few years after I left I became obsessed about finding the real answers to my questions and also surprising myself by finding things that have casted a bad light on the Jehovah’s Witnesses and other religions alike.
So I’m 23 now and how do I feel?
Fallacies. The whole lot of it. I was stripped of a childhood thanks to a fairytale. I don’t blame my family as they were all fooled. God is not existing. And trust me, I wish he was real just as much as the next, but he’s not. There is no God. The bible is the greatest work of fiction and poetry that there is, but it’s killed millions, those who buy into it. I understand these will be unliked thoughts; but I’m my mind, they are too correct.
You are blinded from the truth with their lies. I wish I could wake the people from their senses but some are just too far gone. This has devolved into a rant like writing now I know; but I just had to get it off my chest. Don’t be blinded please; your wasting your life. I don’t care what religion you believe in; it’s all just lies upon lies upon lies. Have faith in yourself and not a story.